A Hodge Podge of Thoughts

I'm home alone...at 7:00 at night...
It's quiet.
Del's gone home teaching...Kathryn is babysitting Preston.
I can think without having to answer questions.
I can feel without having to explain 'why'.
Or...I can not feel at all...without having to explain..why.
Listening to music; of course.
Sad day today with the death of two dogs at work. One a beagle and one a golden lab. Both families sobbed at the loss of their family members. My heart ached for them...so I cried; alone.
While reading the national news, I saw how some families in Somalia were trying to leave certain places of drought and famine to get to other cities where there were emergency centers set up for their relief. But in the over 50 mile walk to the next place, some children dropped dead in their tracks from starvation, dehydration and disease and their mothers had to make the decision to leave their bodies there as they pushed on in order to save the other 3-4 children she was carrying. At in a few instances, the mother even had to choose to leave behind the 'not yet deceased' child in order to save the others.
I couldn't do it. I just know it would be a choice I would not be able to make. So I cried, again.
And on the very same page, still getting headlines, would be the title of an article reading 'Two Actresses Wear Same Dress to Major Event...who wore it best?' Who in the **** cares???
I was angry...really??? Such 'insignificance' given equal credit to that of the loss of life from disease, starvation and calamity. I was so disappointed.
Then of course, we have the beginnings of the Presidential races/campaign...I hate politics. I hate the mud slinging, the degrading of good and honest people and then the lifestyle and deceit of those not so good and honest; the back stabbing...the throwing under the bus of same party candidates and then eventually, the electing of evil and corrupt politicians into our Nations leadership. And this will go on for over the next year.
But I have sports!!!! Thank heavens I have sports!!!!! Pre-season has started for the NFL....the Colts lost their first game (argh), but it doesn't count yet...and BYU actually starts the day before we leave on our family cruise!!! Whoot whoot!!! I can feel the electricity in the air... and I am ready for some football.
Jordan and Lexi arrive next weekend where they will stay for a week...we will have family pictures taken, have some water fun...good food, good games and tons of memories before we actually 'board ship' and sail away on our week long cruise. In the meantime, I am trying desperately to stay on my diet while feeling the nagging hunger pains of some good old junk food. I haven't gained any pounds back, but I'm not feeling as thin, as I haven't been running or walking. ARGH!! But, not to beat myself up over it...
In the middle of a mental meltdown. Not really depression...but just...well..not wanting to be social..don't want to talk...don't want to 'visit'...don't want to do anything that takes explanation. I need things that are simple...simply easy.
Make sense?
Not to me either...