This was moving week for my mother. She sold her home 2 months ago, and this weekend was when we would actually finish moving everything out of her home and all things either going to Deseret industries, the dump or Becca's home. Garth and Jennifer were there to help with the finishing of the whole move - and between them and Del, they were able to move all the big items and I was able to pack up mom's bathroom, bedroom and closet and move them, along with HER, over to Rebecca's house.
Mom had several moments of tears. realizing all memories and experiences she was leaving behind as she took this next step in her life. That was her home with daddy. A lot of emotions to bare, let alone all the physical changes she was having - now being dependent on Becca and Lance to take care of her. She's always been so sober and stiff lipped, but recently, her emotions have been worn on her sleeve and she is V ERY tender hearted. Changes - she is not good with changes. And this was a BIG one.
But Lance and Becca had done so much to the house for mom's move - her own remodeled bathroom, bedroom and private sitting/computer area. We decorated it with her personal things - pictures, memories - clothes into her drawers - closet hanging bars had to be removed and rehinged lower so mom could reach them, so Del did that. Then Garth and Del completely made, set and and finished shelving and storage in Becca's basement. It was a huge project that they were able to knock out in about 3 hours. It truly was wonderful to see them working together, completing this task for Lance and Becca. And they were very appreciative.
There were wonderful meals, both at home and out together - a BYU/Baylor football game, of which we (BYU), were expected to lose. But NOPE - in typical BYU fashion, we won the game with a level of excitement and anticipation that were unmatched before. SOO fun. Mom was such a good sport to wear her BYU gear for the game - pictures. I got to spend some much needed personal time with Becca, filling my soul with peace and comfort. I've been missing her terribly and just needed to be with her. Her new home is adorable - backyard perfect for a huge garden. I could have moved right then and there and never been happier.
And I displayed that emotion and torn apart heart the Sunday morning at 6:30 as we got up and left for home. Everyone was still asleep and as we drove away, I was sooo sad. For the next few hours I was moody and despondent. I didn't treat Del very kindly. I'm tired of Texas - need and want a change. Poor Del. I frustrated him with my not being happy with life right now. When I finally softened my heart enough to have a discussion with him, we talked about the importance of me learning how to enjoy the journey and path we are on, instead of wanting everything to always be different. Over hours, we came to the conclusion that we are staying in Texas, for now. But if the garden and family situation doesn't change and get better down here, then I will ask us to move. The family situation being Kathryn and Ammon living with us. I'm needing to feel independent again and have my home and privacy back. But I can't stand the thought of not being there for Peyton while she needs me. So the conclusion was - they will stay, until Peyton no longer needs a babysitter because she will be going to kindergarten. That's when they will need to move. Now, if they prepare and choose to buy a home before that, then they will leave, but I will still watch Peyton. But I felt comfort with that decision.
We stopped and bought peaches in Farmington and canned them the day after we got home from our trip. I have basically tried to live my new convictions and promises I made throughout this trip and have found myself much happier and content. I have talked with Kathryn and Ammon and feel the decision of when to move is appropriate and very generous of us. Kathryn and Ammon have both started new jobs and life now continues as normal. We had stake conference last week and because of my spiritual mind changes and attitude adjustment, I actually felt love and compassion for my stake president that I have not had for years. His words and expressions from the spirit, truly touched my heart, and I was able to hear what the spirit desired me to hear. Huge step for me.
So TONS of changes for and about me. An overall really good trip for us. I forgot to mention that while in Wyoming at Chad and Bethany's, we were able to have a 2-3 hour discussion with Bethany about some of the trips she and Chad have taken over the years, with their trip to Jeruselem being her favorite. She shared memories and experiences that were so spiritual and inspiring to us, that Del and I decided that we wanted to take the exact trip they had taken. When we arrived I home, I took the time to look up the trip - at a cost of over $12,000. Took my breath away. I was sure Del would say no - not that he has said yes, but more that I have been the one to say we can't afford that. But at what cost do you put a limit on the experience - the learning and education from the tour guide and walking where Jesus walked. I can say that there will be more discussion to be had -with what result, I honestly don't know. A trip of a lifetime - but one we may need to pass over due to cost. What a sad reason to use , but so realistic in the world in which we live.
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