Emerson Has a Birthday

Emerson is ONE!
I can hardly believe that a year has gone by already.  He walks, tries to talk, laughs, plays and is just such an adorable little man that it's hard to remember him as a baby.
And he is adored.  Del had surgery on the day his parents threw him a birthday party, so we are going over tomorrow and spending some time with him and his parents - taking them all to dinner and then giving him just two little toys.  It will be fun to have some one on one time with him.
I sure love you little EM!!!

A Huge Sigh Of Relief

Surgery went well.
I am so grateful and feel an overwhelming thanks to my Heavenly Father for watching over my sweet husband before and after his surgery.  Good nurses - great surgeon, who approached this surgery with faith and expertise - even asked us to pray with him before he took Del back to operate.  I was touched with his level of both physical and spiritual concern over the situation.
Two members of our high priest group came early Friday morning before we left for the hospital, to give Del a priesthood blessing.  Such a beautiful blessing of promise and comfort.  It was perfect.  Del is so admired and loved by the members of our ward.  So many prayers and thoughts were shared on his behalf...and many prayers answered when the surgeon reported to me the success of the surgery immediately after he was finished.  I didn't realize how anxious and nervous I was over the whole thing until after the surgeon left, and I felt my whole body relax and sink into the chair.  I was so grateful to my Father in Heaven for answered prayers.
Lexi came to the hospital with Emerson, which really lightened my anxiety and gave me some relief from what was going on.  I was so thankful for her company and joy from Emerson's presence.  I was able to experience some joy during a stressful time.
Del is recovering nicely.  He's over doing it - not resting like he should - even went to church today and is at a youth fireside tonight.  I knew he would - that's Del. I wish he would take the time to heal like he needs to, but Del will always be Del.  I can't fight him on it.  I just have to trust that he is doing what he needs to to feel well.
I am needing to really dig in to memorizing the music for my choir participation.  It's hard...and takes a lot of time that I haven't been giving it.  But now that I have Del's situation out of the way, I will try and focus on my choir role.  Last Thursday night, Brett listened to each of our voices and then placed us next to others in our section to see where we fit the best.  I was put in the 'core' of the second altos - which means, there are 10 out of the about 28 of us, that are called the 'core' - and all the other women are supposed to try and sound like 'the core'.  The core 10 ladies sound much alike - we blend really well - I was pleased and will try to sound my best.  I had attached myself to three of the ladies right from day one, feeling that I sounded a lot like them.  And sure enough, we are the middle of the core.  Now, I will try to sing my best.
Life is sweet right now.  Valentine's Day yesterday, was spent making my sweetheart homemade bread and playing with the grand kids who came to see Papa.  Then we spent the evening watching the BYU basketball game.  My idea of a perfect evening.  We have no expectations of each other and we just enjoy the simplicity of our peaceful lives.  We adore each other and enjoy spending every moment together.  This past week was especially intimate and sweet  - we are so deeply connected spiritually and in all other ways.  It makes life so worth it.
A huge sigh of relief.

A Twinge of Concern

For over a week, I have felt a few uneasy emotions of anxiety - about Del - and his surgery.
It's silly - just a hernia repair - a simple procedure.  Under General Anesthesia.
Del is blowing the whole thing off.
I'm being clingy - wanting to spend a lot of quiet and personal time with him - possessive - desperate for intimacy - I'm not usually like this - EVER.  Del's been happy, even giddy to accommodate.
Today, he received a phone call from the hospital asking 'pre-surgery' questions..and being told do's and don't about the day before and day of surgery procedures.  One of the last questions he was asked was 'do you have a living will?'  Huh???  Why?  I assume that's a standard question asked of all surgical patients having a simple hernia repair???  He told them he didn't and they said, 'You may want to get that taken care of before Friday.'
This is where that 'twinge of concern' comes into play.  I know there are always risks to any surgery when being put under.  And I know and understand there are standard questions that have to be addressed and answered.  But I swear, if they ask if he has a DNR or anything like that, I'm calling this whole minor surgery off and just letting him suffer through the rest of his life in hernia distress.
I told him he could let the hospital know that there would be a short red-head in the room that will have no questions as to what to do with the life insurance money and other contents of the will.
Don't push my buttons!!!

Chaos in the Bedroom

I'm not a REALLY great housekeeper - but I'm not a slob either.
This is just me...without a chest of drawers.
I've been without one since the end of November when we sold the one I had at a garage sale.  Del was planning to make us some new ones, along with a new farm table for my kitchen.
Now, with his hernia surgery scheduled for next week, he will be 'out of commission' for over 6 weeks, and we just can't go that long with my bedroom looking the way it does.
I wanted to go a little 'rustic' with the furniture - Del says 'we have enough shabby chic throughout the house' and he wants to go a little more elegant.  So, last weekend, we did us a little shopping and stopped at a place called 'Home Zone', where we found a nice chest of drawers with a mirror on the top that we both liked.  While Del was filling out the paper work and paying for it, I roamed through the place and found a dining/kitchen table that I kind of liked - not the 'farm table' I was hoping for, but a really nice marble top table that Del found perfect for his 'elegant look ' he likes.  So we ended up buying it too.  We should be able to pick them both up sometime next week.
Yesterday, I ended up taking Del's truck to work while he went and took my car to get new tires on it. Apparently, each tire had been worn down to splitting at the seams and I was experiencing a really bumpy ride to work every day.  Del says when I get in it today, I will have the smoothest ride ever. And I was thinking his truck was a really smooth ride.
Wishful thinking.

The Folder: Time to Update

We have a 'folder'.
In the folder, we have all our personal information - pin numbers, bank accounts, life insurance policies, passwords, computer files, wills... etc etc...SOOO, in the case of any emergency, we grab the one folder and have almost all the information we need.
We don't have to use the folder often, if at all.  But we do have to update it with new or current information when we get it, or when we are in situations that may mandate needing the information in the folder - like surgeries.
Del is having surgery next week.  Nothing serious - a hernia, that HAS been getting worse over the past two months because he hasn't stopped to get it taken care of, but instead, has decided to do even things he shouldn't  be doing with a hernia - like roto tilling the garden - shoveling trenches in the garden, planting rows and rows of potatoes, onions and veggies in the garden - carrying and lifting heavy things etc etc..Basically, just being Del without a hernia.
But now, it's gotten painful enough that he finally brought it to my attention AND called the doctor himself for an appointment.  THAT'S when you know its bad....when HE says it hurts and goes to the doctor.  So yesterday, he goes to the surgeon, who confirms he has a hernia - a big one, and then proceeds to explain the surgical procedure and what it will include.  In this conversation, he also mentions to Del that where he would usually do this surgery in a surgical center under general anesthesia, he instead, wants to do it in the hospital with an anesthesiologist and emergency facilities because of Del's MS.  Apparently, MS patients tend to have more complications from anesthesia and surgery than others, and he just wants to be in the hospital where he would have emergency help if he needed it.
GULP.
That's when I told Del, it was time to update the folder.
I'm not freaked - I'm not paranoid - I'm wanting to be prepared; smart; ready, for anything.
Mainly, because there are some things in the folder I have no idea about and I just need to know.
So, last night, I asked Del if he would just get the folder ready and completed before surgery...just to give me a sense of security.
After some teasing and joking, he agreed it would be a good thing to have done.

Another Visit From My Daddy

Over the weekend, I went to Kylie's house where she gave a 6 hour seminar on photography.  I helped her out by picking up the food for the luncheon and setting it all up and then cleaning it all up afterwards.  I didn't really get a lot of the seminar, but I'm going to hit her up later for some private one on one training.
But I mention it, because it was part of my dream last night.  I dreamed that I had a photography class I was taking in college, and I had to get to class really soon because I was going to be late.  But I was able to 'fly' there and got there just in time for it to start.  It was at my nephews apartment - Spencer Moon, and his wife, Brittany was the one giving the class. There were several people there - Janene, my mom, Elaine, Becca and my sister Rachel.  We were having lunch before the class would start, and I had just finished making soup (which I made for dinner last night), when in walked me dad from the kitchen.  We all couldn't believe it, because we knew he was dead.  But we touched him, to make sure he was real, we laughed with him and my mom was THRILLED that she finally got to see him again.  She had been feeling unloved as since his death, she had not had any dreams about him, or felt him or nothin'.  But there he was.  I tried to take a picture of him with my camera to document that he was there, but it was off centered and not a very good one.  I ran into the kitchen to get him a bowl of the soup too, but it kept over flowing and spilling as I tried to walk with it.  So I emptied part of it out and only took out a small amount for him.  He had moved off to a little picnic table outside, where he was sitting and visiting with mom.  The rest of us watched from inside.  When his phone rang on the table inside, Rachel looked at it, and sure enough, it was a phone call from the nurses station at the rest home place where he had been staying before he passed away.  We all agreed that it really was him and that he was back to visit with us girls before having to go back.  Mom began to complain that it wasn't enough time, and I told her to be grateful, and that this was what she had been wanting for a long time.
Then, I woke up by the sound of my alarm.
He looked good in my dream...like from 10 years ago.  And he was with us girls like it wasn't any big deal.  Just showed up for lunch with us.
Sweet dream.  I like dreaming about him.

Adding To My Drug Addiction

I went to the eye doctor today.
I missed last year - only because I was so busy and just didn't take the time to go in.  But I was noticing HUGE changes in my eye sight last year.  I felt so unstable in what I had come to know as 'normal' for me.  I am far sighted in my left eye...like REALLY far sighted.  My right eye does almost all my 'seeing' for me - carries most of the load.  I was wearing glasses 24/7 in order to see at all.  But over the past year, it like flip-flopped on me.  I was wearing my glasses only to read and do my computer work, but I was taking them off to drive and watch t.v..  Not the norm.  And over the past year, I was blinking a lot in order to 're-set' my eyes to focus each time - feeling like my eyes were always dry and I wasn't able to see anything unless I blinked several times to clear the blurriness.
Well..it's ANOTHER side affect of menopause.  OF COURSE it is.
Apparently, another side of menopause, is dehydration of the body and it's natural oils and moisture.  The natural oils in my eyes and eye lids are not secreting any oils - and the little oil I do have, is like sluggish and thick, not lubricating my eyes. All my 'numbers', for my prescription, are the same as two years ago.  So I don't need new glasses, I just need special lubricating treatment for the next two months, to see if I can stabilize my body oils and lubrication.  So, the eye drops on the left will be twice a day, and the fish oils on the right will be daily - and then twice a day, I have to give each eye, a massage - heat massage, to be more specific.  It will supposedly, loosen the eye oils in my lids and glands.
Ah....and I was going to be the one in our marriage to 'age gracefully'.