You know how I know that???
I DON'T HAVE ANY!!!
Last night, I was looking through Facebook as I was winding down from my day and noticed some posts from several different ladies in the ward. There is a group of about 8-10 of them who seem to have a BFF group friendship. There were several different pictures posted of activities they had recently all done together, and for one slight moment, I was envious - sad - jealous - lonely - and very longing of a relationship like that. I understand that I could be the mother of any one of them. They are all in their late 20's, MAYBE some early 30's. Yes, I am double their age. I don't fit in. I don't relate to them. They each have one-two children, many of them expecting #3 or have just had #3, husbands all at new jobs, they have new starter homes and no kids in school yet, so they all just hang together. I have absolutely NOTHING in common with them EXCEPT that I have all their little kids in my Nursery class.
So I was thinking this morning, 'who ARE my BFF's' and 'who DO I like to hang out with?'
It's my daughters and my sisters. Really. They are the one's who bring me the most joy - I know my husband and my sons too, but mostly, the girls. We just don't do enough of it. I'm going to need to work on that though. But outside of family, I don't really take the time or make the effort to be a BFF to anyone. I'm a lazy and very inconsistent friend. I need to do better at that too. I wish it came a little more naturally for me. I only have myself to blame - which means I am the only one who can fix it too.
But I'm an introvert. You would never guess that because I used to be the life of every party I went to. Now, I don't go to the party any more. And if I do, I am most generally quiet. I guess that's the toll my anxiety and panic attacks have taken on me. I would much rather stay home in the comfort and safety of my own home.
It all makes me feel old. But I guess I am -
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment