'Feelings vs Emotions'

Articles, books and talks have been my constant companion the past few weeks and I have been trying to absorb all I can and glean from the knowledge and experiences of others so as to live a life more aware of the people, situations and circumstances around me. Right now, the main topic I have been embracing is the difference of 'emotions verses feelings', and the 'giving of your heart' to another.
I had an interesting discussion with Del tonight about the differences between men and women with the main theme centering around 'affairs of the heart'... 'affairs' not in the sense of unfaithfulness but in the definition of 'all matters pertaining to' the heart....love, romance, hurt, feelings etc...
I tend to think that our Heavenly Father has quite a sense of humor. To know that He intends for man and woman to co-exist for any length of time in any sense of harmony is comical in itself. But to then hope that they will WANT to continue that existence together throughout the eternities is almost beyond any common sense. There would certainly have to be more to the relationship than just being 'best friends' and a 'great physical relationship'.
Marital harmony is primarily a matter of morality...of living true to your heart and 'light' rather than a matter of skill or knowledge. Harmony is a moral issue and we cannot ignore our moral feelings because of current stress or strife; and it is not subject to either current pressures or past events. Marital harmony is achieved when we love our spouse as ourselves and act in their best interest.
Love is the act of 'giving one's heart' to someone else; loving them more than ourselves and being willing to, in turn, receive their heart with the same covenant and commitment as you have given. But LOVE is given and received at a great risk to each partner for the simple fact that in the giving of our heart to another, we then lose the ability to protect it.
Feelings come to us humans automatically. We really can't control them or their onset. They are a part of everyday life and come to us as the result of things and events that happen to us. Feelings are wonderful. They let us know we are alive. They are reactions to life's experiences. And our feelings matter, both the good and the bad.
Most recently, I have been learning the feeling of 'hurt'. Interestingly enough, it has been on both ends of this feeling, the receiving AND the giving of 'hurt' that has been the lesson learned. When someone you love or respect says or does something negative towards you publicly or privately, you experience a feeling of hurt. The more important the person is to you, the more hurt you feel.
The hurt has been intense...both that given and that received. I have been the one involved on both ends. It has caused me great sorrow to realize first of all, the hurt I have caused others. Although unintentional, the hurt has the same result as if I had purposely set out to cause a loved one pain. The hurt is 'no less' just because 'I didn't mean to'. The tears have flowed just the same.
And the hurt has been complete for me on the 'receiving' end of the pain. At first, it was this hurt and pain that I was focused on. But over the past weeks, I have come to realize that my personal hurt and pain are only secondary to the hurt and pain I have caused others. It is THIS pain and hurt to others that I now mourn over.
They gave me their hearts and I didn't protect them...I broke my promises. Hurt feelings.

Emotions differ from feelings. Emotions 'come out of us'. We 'decide' our emotions. We choose them. Emotions don't 'just happen' like feelings do. We can change our emotions and how we display them. You don't decide what you 'feel' but you do decide what to 'emote'. Feelings come spontaneously, while we choose emotions from a variety of responses open to us based on our interpretation of the initial feeling.
Hate and anger are emotional decisions we make. Because of the hurt I caused, I am now on the receiving end of both of these emotions. Having to accept these emotions from someone I have loved has been a very difficult process. And yet, I am learning some much needed humility and compassion that I'm quite sure I would not have learned any other way. I am seeing things in a different light...understanding some emotions and feelings of my own that I would have never before been willing to express.
At a cost I would never be willing to pay again, I have learned the importance of the trust someone places in another when they willingly 'give their heart' to another; a trust I will never take for granted again; a trust I will pray for again...'someday'.
But until that 'someday' comes, I live with a grateful heart for the gradual forgiveness being shown each day, little by little, step by step.
And to a loving Heavenly Father who loves ALL of His children.