Sunday, February 15, 2009

Tornado Overload

Eight years ago, when we lived in Lindon Utah, a tornado went through the Salt Lake Valley that both shocked and stunned all of us in Utah County. Too close, just waaayyy too close. Kathryn was just 8 years old and her phobia started at that time. We assured and reassured her that we would never live in a place where tornados would be a threat to us. Of course, we never thought we would live in Texas either.
Eight years later and moving to Texas, we have had our fair share of 'warning' and touchdown's' to last a lifetime. We arrived in Texas on Friday December 27th. The following Wednesday was January 1st, the first Wednesday of the month. At noon, to Kathryn's sheer horror, the sirens began blaring warning us of what Kathryn was sure would be her death. Phone calls came from both my sister Elaine and Bev Roberts, my BYU roommate, informing us it was only a monthly drill to prepare us for possible warnings in the future. Kathryn barely lived through the anxiety she suffered that day. I barely lived through the multiple tornadoes this week. I should have heard sirens and I should have seen some signs. But it came quickly and hit hard.
Monday evening, Del informed Kathryn that she would not be allowed to go and get her much anticipated drivers license the next day, due to missing too much Seminary and he felt she hadn't prepared enough. I felt the stirrings of the upcoming tornado and by 7:oo that evening, we were in full tornado alert. Kathryn was screaming and yelling at full throttle, Del was standing firm and trying to use reason while his 16 year old basically went balistic. Of course, I was taking the brunt of most of it...before Kathryn went storming out of the house, she blurted out that 'she figured it didn't matter since her life was over anyways because there was going to be huge fall out from an accusation she had made about a young man. Tornado touchdown! No details at this point because honestly, I don't have the energy or the memory to recall everything that happened in the next two days..I just know the police were involved, the young man and his family, school authorities, McKinney police AND school police - and then Kathryn left home.
She came home Tuesday, packed and left. It didn't help that there were actual tornado warnings OUTSIDE the doors of our home that didn't even come close to the tornado that was rushing through the MIDDLE of my home.
At about 5:00, the news reports were getting worse and worse about tornado's coming our way. I was already praying...had been for hours, that the Lord would be able to see us through this personal tornado I was being asked to weather. When things were at their peak, I received a phone call from Kylie - she had Kathryn, who was going through a total anxiety meltdown and wanted her parents. She got on the phone just as the major winds and rain hit Frisco and I talked her through most of it as she sobbed and cried that 'she was sorry and loved us and wanted to come home'. The sirens were then blaring in McKinney and she worried about us and made Kylie bring her home. Much talked about and discussed that night of which I need not share with this blog, but needless to say, I went in to what I have dubbed as 'survival mode'.
Wednesday, I didn't function - no work, no thinking, no talking to anyone, no interaction with the world. I sunk very deeply into a hole that I am just coming out of today.
The rest of the week? - I gave two week notice at work and then took it back. Then I gave the same two week notice and have not yet taken it back. We can't survive without my paycheck - at least being completely out of debt by the time we hoped to be, but is that a good reason to work? I can't leave the responsibility soley on Del to handle - it would kill him. So, I'll probably give my apologies AGAIN to my cousin Chad and tell him I'll stay.
Otherwise, we have survived the week of both 'outside' and 'inside' tornados. But we're beaten up. Kathryn is wiped. But she should be praised for her good decision in taking care of the terrible thing that happened to her. It has taken it's course with SOME aftermath, but nothing that we can't handle with the police and as a family. The school is being very protective of her..appears the young man overstepped his boundaries...enough...but lots of rumors and gossip will follow and will eventually take their toll on Kathryn.
Del has decided to listen to me a little more about how he handles the raising of our children. Del is pretty close to perfect. Always has been. His shortfall? He expects it out of every member of his family...and we just can't live up to that, so he tends to be most often, disappointed in us that we aren't quite what he thinks we should be. I have survived 26 years of marriage with him by realizing HIS expectations aren't the one's I need to meet, but mine and the Lord's. It's made live survivable. Not so much for the kids though. Jordan, more than the other two, has felt the lingering disappointment from Del. It has been heart wrenching to see Jordan so desperately try to please his unpleasable father. I have had to cover a lot of the empty space between those two.
Anyways....
So, I have both thanked AND questioned the Lord for the tornados that were sent to our home this week. Hearts have been softened and eyes opened to the hand of the Lord. We remain battered and bruised from the whole drama of it all, but I thank those who have been there for us in prayers, thoughts and their presence.
Now, I'm just tired. Jordan has called once or twice this past week saying he's lonely. He has no sweetheart, no unattached friends and spent Valentines Day going to the movies alone. I'm hoping the 'cousin get together' tonight will bring him out of his 'lonely' slump. He needs to get a life that is wonderful and fulfilling WITHOUT a sweetheart in it. Then, she will come along when it's the right time. Yeah, tell HIM that! Raising older teenagers is much harder than when they were 14-18. I imagine they will always have needs that only a mother can meet.
There are a few pieces of the weeks storms that need to be picked up and thrown away. And the aftermath may be evident for a few more weeks. But at least there were no eternal casualties. I can't imagine my massive headache going away anytime soon, and my diet was shot to #*@%!!! So tomorrow, we start a new week with clear skies and determination to get things back on track. No more tornado hits for at least...hm...I need at least a week for scars and wounds to completely heal.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

I've been worried...so sorry to hear about everything. Hang in there.

AnnCP said...

Call me.