Sunday, January 8, 2012

Mountain High's and Valley Low's

There are many many days that I feel strong from the support and love of both family and friends. I feel like I belong to a group of people that love me, understand me and have an eternal place in my life. For the most part, I feel healthy...both physically and spiritually.
But then, I have an occasional day where, it's not that I don't still feel good about myself, BUT, I do notice that I still have a place in my life that is needing more time to heal and feel whole again. I still feel some pain...loss...hurt...emptiness...and sadness.
That place is called...my Valley Low.
Those moments are far and few between now so I'm pretty disappointed in myself when I have one at all. But it just makes me realize that I'm never going to be completely healed from the hole in my heart created this past year.
I just need to figure out a way to get through it better...
I've had a few of those days recently when I have been physically sick and had too much time to think about it. I've had a few dreams too that have upset me and caused a few tears...
Someday, I will know what I was to learn from this whole experience.
Someday, I will know that I am....okay.
That someday just isn't here yet.

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